"People want to paint a picture,
so give them all the colors."
I started this blog almost 5 years ago to share my ups and downs of marriage, first time motherhood, and as my soapbox for social issues I think are important. Over time, this blog has become my haven. My way of gauging where I'm at in my life. As long as I'm writing, I'm okay. I have also learned over the last two years that life doesn't always have to look pretty. It doesn't always fit into a perfectly defined box. Life can be ugly and really hard, but the truth is that the struggle is all apart of the story. And despite what society and my upbringing have told me, it's okay to talk about the things that everyone else is to scared to even whisper about. It's okay to expose our monsters and our weaknesses. Because you know what? Deep down we all have struggles-struggles we're just waiting for someone to talk about and remind us that we are not alone.
And so, that's why I write. I write for the girl in her twenties who is getting a divorce and who feels so lost. I write for the young mom who thinks that her baby is the only baby who doesn't sleep through the night, or who thinks her toddler is the pickiest of all eaters. I write for the woman trying to survive an abusive relationship and isn't quite sure what her next move should be. I write for the newlywed girl-child trying to make a go of it in this very grown up world. I write because I want to reach out, take their hands, and lead them away from my mistakes. I want to look every single one of them in the face and say, "Guess what? I've been there and I survived. You will too." My scars make me who I am and so does the story behind those scars. I truly believe that when God gives you a story to tell, you tell it. You own it. You don't hide from it. Because you never know whose heart you're touching, or whose life you're changing.
Be sure to take some time to read my page titled, "My Story". It's about my past. About the hard, cold, rock bottom on which I re-built my life. It's a glimpse of the scariest monster that I have hiding in my closet. It's not pretty- it's actually very, very ugly, and if all you take away from it is something like,"Wow. I'm not alone. There's a girl out here whose been hurt as badly as I'm hurting, and look she's doing okay.", then I've succeeded.
If I could share one thing with you from my story today, it's that motherhood is anything, but perfect, and more often times than not it is interrupted by this crazy, beautiful, intense thing we call life. Our stories and our scars don't define us, but the make us into the women and mothers we strive every single day to become.
So, take a deep breath and stay a while. You've found a haven and a friend here. Welcome.