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Thursday, January 23, 2020

The Beauty of Sisterhood



As someone with 3 younger sisters-one of whom is 13 years younger than I am-I deeply and whole heartedly understand the bond of sisterhood. 

 I understand what it means to have someone who always has your back-even when you’re wrong. 

 Who always keeps you grounded. 

 Who is there to constantly remind you who you really are and where you came from, but who is right there in the front row cheering for you and your future. 

 I understand what it’s like to have really hateful, nasty fights, but know that eventually when the dust settles that person will STILL be there-loving you unconditionally in a way that only they know how. 

 It’s beautiful and messy all in the same breath. 

 My sisters taught me things like what loyalty really means, and how no matter what-and even if you don’t like it-you need people in your life who are ALWAYS going to tell you the truth. 

 ALWAYS.

 People who aren’t afraid to hurt your feelings or step on your toes, if it means that a better you will emerge from the conversation. 

 People who are your biggest fans whether you  are doing big #bossbabe things or managing to keep your kids alive for one more day. 

 My sisters are my people. 

 My very best friends.

 And when my husband and I found out that we were expecting, I knew in my heart of hearts, that I wanted another girl. 

 I wanted my daughter to have another sister. 

 She had been blessed with a baby sister from her dad and bonus mom, but as someone with 3 of them-I can tell you-you can never have to many. 

 I wanted another sister for her for all of the reasons above and SO many more. 

 I wanted her to continue to experience what it was like to have someone idolize you more than you deserve. 

 To know what it feels like to have your words carry weight that so many others don’t. 

 I wanted there to be deep bonding and another life long friendship. 

 And in month 13 of her new sister’s life, I am finally starting to see what that’s going to look like for our family.

 You know, having my children 10 years apart is something that gets a lot of eyebrow raises. 

 You’d be surprised just how MANY people have commentary for that. 

 Sometimes the conversation is awkward. 

 Sometimes I feel this need to justify my choices to them or haphazardly “tell them my story”-which usually ends in more nervous, weird conversation. 

 And other times, I just smile and nod. 

 I listen politely to their surprise and shrug my shoulders and move on.

 But in month 13 of being a mom of two, I am starting to realize that while it may be very surprising to many-for my family and I-it is EXACTLY what God knew we needed. 

 Without going into a huge, long thing-let me just say this: my days as a 23 years old, first time Mom were some of the hardest years of my life. There is NO WAY that girl could have tackled two children back to back. 

 But, fast forward 10 years later. 

 A smarter, wiser, stronger me has emerged from the ashes. 

 One that was/is WAY more ready for the journey of child #2. 

 But more than that, I am learning that I am ready BECAUSE I have child #1. 

 I never intended for Daughter #1 to be the helpmate she is to me with Daughter #2, but-mercifully-she is. 

 I hardly ever ask, but when I do, she swoops in to save my sanity. 

 And most of the time, she does it without me asking and when I least expect it. 

 And she ALWAYS does it all with such grace, such patience, and such love. 

 She is my saving grace this time around. 

 And whether she realizes it or not, she is creating the life long relationship with her sister that I so desperately wanted for her. 

 One that I prayed for. 

 One that will stay with her probably long after I’m gone. 

 These two. 

 They complete me more than they know.

 But watching them start to complete each other is a story for the ages. 

 One that God is writing right before my eyes. 

 And friends, getting to watch it-first hand-will be the GREATEST chapter of my entire existence. 

 One that I do not take lightly, and one that is worth all the eyebrow raises and commentary about the distance in the age of my children. 

 I may not have understood what God was doing all those years ago, but today-more than any other day-I do. 

 Sisterhood is a beautiful privilege. 

 Only granted to a few.

 But, God knew 10 years ago that Daughter #1 would make the BEST big sister. 

 And once again, He was right.

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