Divorce teaches you lessons you never asked or wanted to learn. It breaks you open and reveals things about yourself...deep things...that you never even knew existed. It completely changes you from the bright, naïve, hopelessly romantic girl of twenty-one into a strong, realistic, painfully honest, and slightly cynical woman of almost thirty. It's more than a writing a new chapter-it's like starting a completely different book.
And in this book I may not get to choose all the characters, but I do get to choose some of them including THE boy. My future leading man. The guy whose out there somewhere in this great, big world just waiting for me. While I am slightly more cynical these days, I haven't given up hope completely. I believe, that despite my mistakes, I deserve a great, captivating love. A love that isn't perfect, but that reminds me everyday that I'm worth it. A love that sees all my flaws, all my quirks, all my terrible, awful, no-good habits and still says, "I choose you.". A love that makes me smile more than it makes me cry. A love that is daring enough to help me break down all my walls. I believe there is a love just like that out there, and that's what I'm waiting for. In fact, I've compiled a list. A real, I-must-be-channeling-my-inner-middle-school-girl list of everything I expect from any boy wanting me to call them mine.
So just for fun I wanted to share it with you. Because let's face it, we're all tired of all the tears I've been crying around here lately, so it's time for something a little more positive. Here we go!
Wait For The Boy Who...
- Actually reads your blog.
- Loves your daughter as his own.
- Never forgets your birthday or puts it off until the last minute.
- FINALLY accepts your love of fresh flowers and surprises you with them often.
- Listens. Really, truly listens.
- Accepts your independent nature, but also knows how loyal your heart truly is.
- Will buy the first copy of your book and ask you to sign it.
- Tells you that you are beautiful every single morning.
- Loves Jesus, and encourages your walk with Him daily.
- Understands the thrill of a perfectly placed kiss on your forehead.
- Loves you in spite of your weirdness, your moodiness, and your semi-crazy antics.
- Always, always, always, always takes your side, even when you both know your in the wrong.
- Trusts you-despite everything.
- Remembers to take out the trash.
- Takes you to Barnes & Noble just because he knows it's your absolute most favorite place in the whole world.
- Will visit museums, libraries, and historical sites without complaining TOO much.
- Can handle you and ALL THREE of your sisters being in the same room.
- Knows your favorite kind of wine.
- Doesn't hate your clothes...even the items that were NOT picked out by your personal stylist a.k.a. your baby sister.
- Knows when you need to be held.
- Knows when you don't want to be held (which is most of the time).
- Gives you money for the jukebox, because he knows how much you love to dance.
- Makes you want to be better every single day.
- Knows which songs to be quiet to in the car.
- Makes you dinner.
- Takes you and your daughter to church.
- Can make you smile, even when everything is falling apart.
- Embraces your OCD about things like cleaning, organization, and having "a plan".
- Remembers that you don't really like jewelry.
- Will actually go see that chick flick with you.
- Makes an effort to get to know your dad.
- Accepts your mother in all her craziness, because he knows she means well and she loves you fiercely.
- Has passport. Will travel. As often as money allows.
- Knows that tequila is your "no-alcohol".
- Smiles at you for no reason.
- Always holds your hand.
- Tells you to go to Target on your particularly bad days.
- Owns a motorcycle (there are just some things you can't give up).
- Isn't afraid of an adventure.
- Actually takes you to that fancy restaurant regardless of the cost.
- Knows that hot tea and alone time with a good book fixes even the worst days.
- You can talk to about anything and absolutely nothing.
- Thinks you're just as beautiful in sweats as you are in that dress.
- Loves country music as much as you do.
- Recognizes your love of all things lovely such as brand new journals, pretty boxes of chocolate, a beautifully wrapped gift, greeting cards, and hand-painted tea cups.
- Washes and vacuums your car for you.
- Picks you up from work and takes you on surprise lunch dates.
- Is your calm place. The place where your mind is finally quiet.
- Isn't afraid to be brutally honest with you, because sometimes you just need someone who doesn't sugar coat everything.
- You can finally trust with ALL the pieces. Even the ones you're terrified to ever let anyone hold again.
- Accepts your best friend. She isn't going anywhere. Seriously.
- Knows how brave and strong you are, but who also knows that sometimes you just want him to be brave and strong for you.
- Gets your sense of humor.
- Encourages you to finish school and get that big corporate healthcare job.
- Loves you. Simply loves you for who you are and who you are becoming.
Quite a list, huh?! Yeah. This girl isn't settling anymore. I may not totally grasp my worth, but I'm starting too. And while I'm still a long way from being ready for another relationship, I think I have a pretty good idea of what I'll be looking for when that time comes.
And you know what?! I can't wait to meet him.
And you know what?! I can't wait to meet him.